Friday, January 21, 2011
Okay, for the record, I don't think blonde women are any smarter or dumber than the rest of us. But I do think that some of the blonde jokes floating around out there are definitely pretty funny. Here's a handful that might amuse you...
A married couple is asleep when the phone rings at 2:00 in the morning. The very blonde wife picks up the phone, listens a moment, and finally says, "How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!" She then hangs up.
The husband says, "Who was that?"
The wife answers, "I don't know, some crazy woman wanting to know if the coast is clear."
* * *
Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a make-up compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror and says, "Hmmm, this person looks familiar."
The second blonde says, "Here, let me see!"
So, the first blonde hands her the compact.
The second blonde looks in the mirror and says, "You dummy, it's me!"
* * *
A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun. She then goes to his apartment unexpectedly and promptly finds him in the arms of a fetching redhead.
Well, the blonde is really angry at this discovery, so she opens her purse to take out the gun. But she is suddenly overcome with grief and points the gun at her head instead of at her cheating boyfriend.
The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it!"
The blonde replies, "Shut up, you're next!"
* * *
A blonde is bragging about her knowledge of state capitals. She proudly says to her friend, "Go ahead, ask me, ... I know 'em all."
The friend says, "Okay, what's the capital of Wisconsin?"
The blonde replies,"Oh, that's easy .. it's W!"
* * *
Question: What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?
Answer: "Is it mine?"
* * *
Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman, is sitting in her U.S. government class when the professor suddenly calls on her. He asks Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about.
Bambi ponders the question, then finally says, "That was the decision
George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware."
* * *
Returning home from work, a blonde is shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She telephones the police at once and reports the crime. The police dispatcher broadcasts the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby, is the first to respond.
As the K-9 officer approaches the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde runs out onto the porch, shudders at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sits down on her front steps, shaking her head. Putting her face in her hands, she moans, "I come home to find all my possessions stolen, call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a blind policeman!