If anyone needs me, I'll be reading. Please don't need me.

If anyone needs me, I'll be reading. Please don't need me.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Poor Bob


Bob works hard at the office but does arrange for some downtime, telling his wife that all he needs to relax is a little bowling two nights a week, and a round of golf every Saturday.

Bob's wife is fine with this, but still thinks he's pushing himself too hard. So, for Bob's birthday, she decides to take him to the local strip club, figuring he'd be tickled and surprised by the somewhat naughty birthday gift.

Upon arriving, however, the doorman at the club greets the couple and says, "Hey, Bob! How ya doing?"

His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before.

"Oh no," says Bob. "He's in my bowling league."

When they are seated, a waitress comes over to Bob with a bottle of Budweiser, and says with a smile, "Figured you'd like your usual."

Bob's wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says, "How did she know that you drink Budweiser?"

"Uh, she recognized me," Bob stammers. "She's the waitress at the golf club. You know I always like to down a cold one after 18 holes!"

A buxom stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Bob, and starts to rub herself all over him. "Hi, Bobby!" she says. "Want your usual table dance, big boy?"

Bob's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club. Bob follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her.

Bob tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it. She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every four-letter word in the book.

Finally, the cabby turns around and says, "Geez, Bob, you picked up a real bitch this time."

Bob expects to be out of traction sometime next week.

1 comment: